Tales From The Treadmill (Day 32)

Things I have seen and learned at the gym over the past month...

Do not wear make-up to the gym.  If and when you sweat it melts.  If you wear mascara and it isn't waterproof and combine it with black eyeliner, a scary face is created.

If you want to be on a soap-opera for your entire life, be on Days of our Lives.  I swear I recognized people from when I saw this show as a wee one when my mother used to watch this in the 70's!!!  I see Doug, Susan, Maggie, Mickey, Hope and Bo...  LOL

People are strange.  And Funny.  And entertaining.

Remember me telling you about the Kimbo Slice character?  Okay, he's freaking me out a little.  He says the same thing every day and it's wearing on my last nerve.  Every single day, outside the locker rooms he yells and points to the attendants, "Here are the hardest working people at Lifetime!".  Yes, they really bust a hump washing, drying, folding towels and keeping up with the locker rooms.  But, please, every day?

Note to older woman who gave me a sore neck.  Watching you made my neck ache - I can only imagine how you felt after that workout.  She was older.  Much older.  And very very thin.  For some reason she insisted on setting the treadmill at a really high incline and clutching the front of the treadmill for dear life.  At this point her shoulders became earrings and her upper arm muscles were so tight that it looked painful to be like this for any extended period of time.  Just talking about it makes me have to move my head to loosen up.

Now, the gross moment.  Okay, we know about naked blow-drying girl, right.  Well, as much as I was freaked out by her - her bod was okay.  The other day there was naked old swimming woman.  What freaked me out most?  She doesn't wear a bra OR underwear and she's a nurse.  She comes in dressed in scrubs, takes the locker next to me, whips off her top and her bottoms and she beeees nekked.  Even worse?  No matter how fast I tried to tie my shoes, it wasn't fast enough.  I'm not sure what was in her locker, but she was bend over with her naked butt in the air searching for the entire time I was tying my shoes.  It was terrifying.

Other lessons learned?  Be careful of the music on your iPod.  I've noticed that I have a natural rhythm when I walk and some music can make me mess up.  In a funny skip, jump, re-step kinda way.  I thought for sure I would face plant a couple of times.  Thankfully I didn't.

More people than I ever would have thought are gross.  People - when you are on a machine, you sweat.  You have germs.  I don't want them and no one else wants them either.  I don't know where your hands have been.  Could you please use the bleach wipes provided EVERWHERE!?  Think about it.  Your hands are one thing and that's super disgusting.  Think about the bikes.  Your doom-pa is sweating on the seat and you just get off and walk away!?  Some poor soul who comes up to the bike 5 minutes later has no idea that your butt sweat is all over that thing and they sit down!  Yes, I have almost shouted to another person - don't touch that machine!!!  But, I have resisted for fear that I will be escorted out of the building.

February will bring about a whole new set of ideas and thoughts and craziness I'm sure.

Oh.  BTW.  The official one month weigh in occurred this morning and I have officially lost 12.2 lbs.
Not biggest loser numbers, but I'll take it.